We’re less than forty-eight hours from Duke Nukem Forever’s release, and reviews are starting to pop up around the internet. Unfortunately, it looks like Duke hasn’t aged very well. Let’s see if we can make The Tlustos cry.
Wall Street Journal: DNF Wasn’t Worth the Wait
- “[Games like DNF] make one appreciate the skill with which modern studios balance many cutting-edge parts while demonstrating creative vision, if only by showing us what it’s like when these efforts fall apart.
Joystiq: Fail to the King, Baby - 2/5
- For all the delaying, the stalling, the drama surrounding the game, it’s tough to say if any part of it has actually benefitted from the more than a decade of development.
IGN: An aging icon awkwardly enters a new era. – 5.5/10
- [DNF] isn’t a revitalization of the early days of the first-person shooter genre or a middle-finger to the increasingly complex and sophisticated nature of videogame entertainment. It’s a muddled, hypocritical exercise in irritation with solid shooting mechanics and decent encounter design.
PC Gamer – 80/100
- There’s no getting around that at the end of that long road is only a good game and not an amazing one. It is what it is. He may not be at the top of his game, but even after all this time, Duke still knows how to party.
The Guardian - 2/5
- There are fine touches – a shrunken Duke zooming around on a remote controlled car for example – and nostalgia and bad taste jokes help you overlook some shortcomings, but fond memories only go so far while the gags just get repetitive.
Blast Magazine: DNF review: retro, crass and disappointing
- The humor is lacking and the gameplay feels incredibly outdated. Want a modern day version of the classic Duke Nukem formula? Play Bulletstorm, not this disappointment.
Duke Nukem Forever has created an interesting situation.
It’s been in development so long, it’s attained legendary status, but does anyone think that 3D Realms was using that time wisely? Gearbox was handed the game, and told, “Do something with this.” They’re suddenly stuck with a legendary turd they have to polish.
Looking at the comments on some of these reviews, the writers are stuck telling the truth about what they’ve been handed to people who have bought into the hype and legend.
Finally, gamers, what do we do? Stick to our guns and claim Duke doesn’t need fancy features, quick load times, and modern humor? If it’s bad, we can’t really blame Gearbox, who (considering their proven track record) likely did the best they could with what they were handed. 3D Realms is dead and gone, and can we really blame 2K for wanting to recoup fifteen years of development costs? Perhaps Duke Nukem Forever would have been better off as vaporware forever.
I could go on, but really, do you care? For those of you that pre-ordered DNF back in the 90s, can anything stop you from buying this on Tuesday?